You, Me or We? (Week 4)
One of the most distinctive aspects of human beings is that we are social. We are each affected by the presence of other people, we form relationships with other people, we join groups with other people, and we behave in certain ways towards members of our own and other groups.
Relationships vary in degree to which both intimacy and sharing occur. This implies the discovery and establishment of common ground over time – both attitudinal similiarities and social preference similarities. There are many different kinds of relationships as we know it, such as kinship where it involves a family whether genetically or through marriage. There are marriage as well and also non-formalized intimate relationships.
In the relationship maintenance process, relational needs are the most important things in the world, to us. Our needs affect our opinions, attitudes, and viewpoints. Generally we’re more aware of unfulfilled needs than the ones that are consistently met. Fundamental life needs in particular are so commonly accepted that we usually overlook them. No one is aware of the air breathed, the ground walked on, the water drunk, and yet these are the needs we miss most when gone. Relationships all have needs, and a good relationship is a mutual filling of these needs.
Take a look at the video; we can see the couple are having a communication breakdown. We can see how it actually comes into terms with advertising with a consumer as well. When two people have strong needs and each fills the other’s needs, there is a powerful interpersonal relationship. Unfortunately a great majority of people fail to see or to understand the other person’s needs. One reason raised by the female for relational dissolution is that she has changed and the guy is unable to adapt to that change of hers, hence resulting in relational dissolution. We see it in the rising cases of divorces and failing relationships amongst our friends, whether it is with their partners or family.
So what actually causes all these relationships to take a downturn?
There are good days and bad ones. Arguments, misunderstandings and disagreements are part and parcel of human interaction but too much, too often, and getting violent are unhealthy for the individuals involved. Most people take the shortest route to settle their differences. They walk off, break up and go separate ways. There are many different types of problems that causes the downfall of a relationship and by looking at the problems, we can slowly adjust ourselves round and fulfil the needs that our relationships are looking for.
We can always look at all those problems and note that communication is the most important factor when it comes down to solving problems. With communication, both sides of the party will learn to understand each other and one another’s’ needs and it is the fulfilment of these needs that keep the relationships alive. Couples that can identify their attraction to positive partner qualities such as compassion, intelligence and ability and most importantly, a willingness to communicate effectively will definitely have better outcomes.
Kelly's Blog 
If we are truly honest with ourselves, good relationships are what we all want in life. It’s a big part of how we spend our time here. Making relationships work isn’t always as easy as we would like. When it becomes a struggle, it upsets our life often more then want to admit.
Relationships are different. They can often feel like they are what ‘makes’ us. Also, small changes in a relationship can feel like a huge struggle – and be very scary. Sometimes, they can push us to emotional breaking points.
I agree the key is good communication flow and a need to want to honour and respect each other, whether it is points of views, ideas and needs, thus when we keep communication working on a conscious level and nuture it on a daily basis, we will find that that is a formula that could make all the difference in the world work better.